wierd dream i had

A News Anchorman sits at his desk ,when we notice bee's beginning to swarm about him, he announces 'its a symphony of bees'. he next news item commences when a dismembered donkeys leg is slapped onto the desk, it still shudders, then a donkey runs into shot and bites hold of the leg, it appears as if he wants the leg back on. The programme cuts to this gentleman named 'Greg' he has had his leg removed in the same scientific process as the donkeys, images of his dismembered leg kicking a football are shown, we are then told that Greg is going to have the process repeated but this time on his arm, he is already preparing to live without by moving objects with his mouth and other arm.

ziegfried mantoof!

i had this strange thought the other day

that tooth fairy's were born with just gums so thats why they need to collect baby teeth, plus they have big mouths so they fit alot in which explains why they visit u at night cos they look so SCARY

no time to think up a title

soft feather flutter

ice induced shudder

between cotton cover

sweet recollection of lover

death sex

Ok I want like a really sad song to play at my funeral nothing wimpy, it has to make every1 cry, fuck yeah lots of tears and like all the girls that I have kissed/fucked would be there all crying, so much tears that it wets their tight white shirts making them see-thru totally exposing their erect nipples and then they would notice how hot each other is and totally start discovering each others wet bodies. BUT THE PRIEST is like a witch doctor and brings me back to life as I rise out of my coffin every1 gasps at the rise in my pants, at my ZOMBIE ERECTION and I totally do every1 there really hard to the max and make every1 cum and they like so satisfied, then I shoot my wad like Spiderman shoots webs and TOTALLY SWING OUT OF THERE.

Oh god that felt great

Keeping my shit nasty

farts

My mother told me that if your farts stink that means your dehydrated, so if someone you know does stinky toots instead of going 'Ew your putrid rotting ass stench is just a reminder of your impending premature death and P.S. nobody likes you badly dressed anorexic bitch we all know you bleach your fingers cos of the vomit stains P.P.S. shut up",

Try offering the offender a glass of water.

blah

you are the circle shape of the well from water cups,
I can fall into you but be brought up in next mornings bucket
To quench your feet as you sit
On my clothes

the feel of your arm hair antenna's tickling me with their dainty fine texture that evoke the scent of your pores, the scent of your sweat, breath, feet, pussy, underarms,
base of your spine compared to neck, the glistening of your lips, the flowing warm rapid river contained in such elegant and classical form.

goth rave

I think im a goth, ive totally missed the boat and am bummed, I was like some hip hopper then a raver but all the time I WAS A GOTH fuck

Thats so lame, everyone is so lame, life is lame errr your such a bad dancer, god it hurts to be this cool.

See I'm awesome at it.

My tan is too rad but so I dont know if i can be a goth,

oooh beach goth. GOTH ON A BEACH, or maybe' goths on beach'
Perhaps i should hang out with these people

goths in hot weather

Im in a band sleep with me. chicks dig that stuff, girls can be likeeeeeee so stupid sometimes, totally.
I want a japanese latino jew icelandic girlfriend, who's into me but like strings me along, and hates men secretly, it will be a really productive relationship.


Im the 80's sax-a-phone in this song we call life.

lets dance little stranger

i had a swedish massage today, they rubbed almond oil on me. i counted down from 20 last night and my eyes nearly exploded,

birthday party

its my birthday this Sunday, and this is how it should be organized

i want a room with crushed red and purple velvet curtains, lighting the room would be sparsely place red and black candles everyone will be drinking red wine out of goblets, the music will be BauHaus, Sisters of Mercy or Lords of the New Church, or some obscure French Cold Wave Band, you know  tunes of that ilk.

In the middle of the room a large naked powder-white woman lays on a couch with a cask wine goon bag strapped to the back of her head with the pourer against her neck, so it seems as if her OWN BLOOD is being drunk! Plus everyone will have to call me Lestat and nobody is allowed to be better dressed then me, everyone's be smoking opium o o o o o o and NOBODY IS allowed to complain that my party sucks, only appropriate themed issues like these examples;

'errr life is so bright'

'The best moisturizer is my own tears'

"i love her because she pain's"

" joy is constipation"

"on my anti-depressants I don’t need my cock"

YEAH ITS GONNA BE SO ORIGINAL!

it just came to me

i exist in what by consensus society defines as '3-d' (some metaphysic will disagree) but the popular use of the internet (a.k.a. the webpage) is only 2-d so that makes me better then the internet (see also facebook,myspace,google,yahoo,youtube, other such popular sites that i defeat with my dimension power)

euro dance

hi my brain thinks to much so ive recently been carrying around a notepad to busy my mind (sodoku is boring) i will start scrawling things in to quell the obsessive horror thoughts, usually it doesn't make sense, or i will write about people on the train example

'the train smells like chicken soup,
chicken soup is smell of piss,
plenty of fish in the yellow sea.'

or i think about girls and what i would send them via sms

'your cooler then watchin empire records for the first time'

'if u had a bad hair cut you would be still sexy'


fun huh,

what do industrial emo's look like, i bet its totally awesome.

im never doing it again

such a embarrassment

how to serve chilli

baby i got it out and im smoothing my own hot sauce on ur face down ur neck, rubbin my bottle squeezing it, milking it whilst u lick ur lips, trickle a little bit of salt over the nozzle to make it sting and tickle.

OOOOOOOOOOOO

happy travel stories

Regret and its lover Guilt fuck constantly in the tent next door,

I told u that u would fuck up ur fringe with those safety sissors

There was thisss onnneee time I was in a bar in largos (ew tourists) and they had this 2 cocktails for 4 euro deal going on and happy hour finished in 30 mins, so I started to breath in the long islands ice teas, 30 mins later stepping up onto the street I realised I had over done myself.

I magically woke up in my tent 4 hours later not knowing how I got there and felt moistness between my legs. It seemed like I had pissed myself, I was overwhelmed with the shame and guilt and ran to the commune sink to wash my scandal sin soaked shorts, returned to my tent, and lay down in shame. In the morning I woke up and found that my 1.5 lt water bottle had tipped over during the night with its lid off, jizzing its contents all over me, but try explaining that to the hot Dutch girl in the tent next door who was woken up by all my late night regret

I also regret my internal rot and mould mutant cannot burn the bigots brains with super fantastic lazer power.

'tit' is one of those words u can spell backwards so it must be important

im so sensitive

this rash wont clear up; i cry so much, daddy never bought be presents, my brothers use to tie me in a ruck sack and leave me on the road; sometimes i sing sweet- poems of lust and depravity to myself in the chill of the night wishing and waiting for my nose to bleed again; blood; i knock my head on the wall and my girlfriend hates me because I watch her change from outside her window;
look at me
look at me
i am so tortured and beautiful so sleep with me then i will cry afterward;
but u wont be able to walk

i post alot to kick things off

three posts

grammer

im like ',' crazy (that was a commer in inverted italics not some attempt at a emoticon) i love using commers (is that how you spell it, how the fuck do you accually spell it?! its not in my spell check), anyway who is this 'government' of the English language that decrees and enforces grammatical law onto people, you know the type those clenched anus people who get all testicle over incorrect spelling, who the fuck do they report to. nobody.

urine is wet

i think chicken soup smells like pee, or is it that pee smells like chicken soup.
when ever someone sits next to me and smells of chicken soup i get the heebie jeebies

how come u can hold it for ages but when ur in like 5 meters of the toilet ur body relaxes and its a frantic struggle to get ur pants down in time?!?!?

another thing to think about it UTI's this doesn't really affect boys (unless its your girlfriend with it) but how common is that thing, if i was a girl that would play with my mind heaps, I wonder how common it is in the military cos you have to hold your  piss for ages when your shooting someone

Also has anyone else noticed the lack of piss mats in Australia, in europe they are quite common place. i find that they reduce splash back and also give off a pleasant aroma, if only i could find a coffee scented one. ooo that would be a joyful experience


Theres nothing like a really huge pee its like u can accually feel urself gettin lighter, all thouse endorphins that kick in as well,

has anyone eva pissed directly into a fridge b4 . I remember one of my first party experiences, i was sporting those hanes grey tracksuit pants (fashion killer from a young ages, i spilt my Milo chocolate drink on it and when it dried it looked like shit stains) and this ''bogan'' started to piss in the hosts fridge. when then the hosts older brother came in and repetitively slammed this 15 yr olds head in the fridge and made him lick it up. Oh I think we all a lesson that day.

I learnt sometimes hiding, even if its in the same room and u can still hear what's going on. helps ease the shock